6 a.m. alarm buzzes, get ready for work, kiss kids goodbye by 7 a.m., and then race to work. Fast forward to 3:30, jet home, play with kids, cook, eat dinner, go for a run (if I am lucky), bath times, kids in bed. At 7:45 I sit down for the first time, spend an hour or so with the hubby, read, and grown-ups go to bed. Repeat.

This is my life. So, do I have it all? No!

Only in America do we have these extreme ideas like ‘having it all’, ‘finding the one’, having ‘the perfect body’, and ‘living the dream’. Not only do I think these things are unrealistic, I think that they are dangerous. Having it all is not attainable because it is fiction. If we spend our time trying to get to a finish line that doesn’t exist- we never stop running! The problem is that someone is always going to have more, or have it better, or have it easier. The grass is always greener and those damn Jones’ are very hard to keep up with. If we are always looking for that next upgrade, whether it’s our cell phones or our homes or our marriages, we will never be satisfied. Now that is an unpleasant way to live- always feeling like there is something better just out of your reach.

Instead of trying to achieve the un-achievable, I propose, we focus on being happy. Just happy; simple as that. Now, to do this may take some creative thinking, but we can choose what to focus on. We may not have control over everything that happens in our lives, but we certainly have control over how we let the circumstances affect us. I am constantly telling myself, “re-frame….re-focus”. Whenever something irritates me, when I don’t have what I think I want, and when someone else is affecting my happiness, I just change my focus. I (try to) learn what I can from the situation, focus on what I DO have in my life, and I move on. I know, easier said than done.

I might not have it all, but I have enough. In fact, I have a little bit of everything. I have a job that makes me happy, but it’s not the biggest and best paying job. I have a handsome husband of five years. We don’t get a lot of fancy dinners and fabulous vacations, but we love each other. I have a social life- not much of one- but it counts! I have great friends and the world’s best sister. And, I have 2 beautiful children that make me smile every day of my life. I can’t believe how much those sticky little monkeys make me melt. But, even with my babies, very often I have to tell them no; that they can’t have it all either.

So, like I said, I don’t have it all, but it’s enough to make me happy. Although, I will admit that when I am reading my son his story and he looks up at me and says, “Mommy, I very love you” it sure feels like I have it all. That is, until- 6 a.m. alarm buzzes….

 

*This was actually submitted for a little contest and since I didn’t win, I thought I would share it with all of you. Who needs money for writing anyway???

Related post : Mommy Enough (pressure)?

Advertisements