Tag Archive: men


me will tennisThe other day I posted on my candysbrain blog facebook page that I was in a bit of a work-out-rut. To snap out of it, I went to the local sled hill and did sprints. It was hard and I am sore but it was also great. In 20 min. I did a great work out that made me feel strong and powerful. I felt like I was doing some much need strengthening of my legs, glutes, abs, etc. I made the joke that ‘this ass is not going to lift itself!’ It made me realize that I had high-hopes for this summer and I am not where I pictured myself for the end of July. I had more of a Jessica-biel-type-image in my mind. (What can I say, I dream big) It is almost fricking August and I’m barely different than when I started (fitness wise, the weight is a food thing). I wanted to get some sort of ‘abs’ this summer. NOT achieved. I wanted to do a 5k in under 29 min. NOT achieved. I wanted to break a sweat 4-5 times a week (sitting on my porch drinking in the sun doesn’t count). NOT achieved.

So what is a goal failure like myself to do? Re-commit! That is right, start now. I don’t want to be the person with the mind set, well I blew June/July so might as well wait until next summer. That’s like having McDonalds for lunch and saying ‘oh well, today is shot. I’ll have ice cream for dinner.’

But, the hardest part of all fitness plans is the accountability part. How can I stay honest during the next 30 days or so?

That’s where all of you come in. I was hoping I could recruit some of you to join me in a fitness challenge. Logistically this gets tricky. I don’t want to and don’t have the time to blog every day about what my exercise plan is. Too time consuming and repetitive. BUT- I can post stuff to the Candysbrain blog facebook page! AND- I don’t want to do this alone and have it be all about me. I would love it if you joined me and posted stuff to the page, commented on my posts, share your tips, ask questions, etc. Any and all fitness levels are welcome. I realize not everyone is ready for sprints or extreme sports, go at your own pace. And, to be clear, this is for women AND men. Here are the little guidelines I thought we could use to keep us moving to. This is what I came up with but I would love to hear your ideas:

1. Minimum of 3 workouts per week

2. At least 1 workout each week has to be something other than running

3. At least 1 workout each week has to be something other than cardio (run, elliptical, bike, etc.)

4. At least 2 workouts during the month have to be something ‘new’ (something you normally don’t do: yoga, hiking, rock climbing, kayaking, etc.)

5. Have some sort of objective measurement system. This could be weight, measurements (waist, hips,etc.), time for a mile or 5k, number of push-ups you can do, etc. It is good to have stats that you can measure yourself against.

And, depending on how involved all of you are… Wouldn’t it be fun to sign up for a 5k together?! If you’re not local, we can do it around the same time. If you are local, we can all run together! I might be a little optimistic here that you guys are going to join me, but here’s hopin’….

If you want to follow along and you haven’t ‘liked’ Candysbrain blog on facebook, please do so to stay informed. If you are “IN” for the challenge either comment below or on facebook. I am really excited and motivated right now.

Let’s do the damn thing!

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Yesterday I pull into the grocery store parking lot and park next to this tiny little car. It looked like one of those cars that may have been fast like 12 years ago, but now it’s just a POS with a big spoiler. Inside the car is a guy in his late 20’s, smoking a cigarette, and wearing sweat pants (mind you, it’s about 2:30 in the afternoon). This guy is unshaven and easily 30 pounds over weight. Now, I doubt I would normally have ever even noticed this guy. I would have just breezed by. But, I couldn’t help but notice his bumper sticker: “No Fat Chicks”. What a douche! Looking back, I wish I would have taken a picture of him to show with this post, but hind sight is a mother…

Who does this guy think he is?! Now I am about to go off on a little rant here so bear with me. If you are a nice guy with realistic standards for women and have a healthy dose of self awareness, don’t worry- I’m not talking to you. On the other hand, if you are a single guy out there, over weight (yes, even that beer belly you’ve acquired since college that nobody is talking about),  and/or balding, but still manage to have expectations of what you need your girl to look like, here is your wake up call.

beer belly

Now don’t get me wrong, us ladies certainly like to look at the boys from magic mike and we drool over pro-football players, and we dream about the models in magazines. What we don’t do is expect our men to fit this image. That would be crazy! This is real life and people don’t often look like that. I mean… I do… but we’re not talking about me 🙂 . You are not going to find Jessica Biel. She dates rich guys with 6 packs. You are not going to find Erin Andrews. She dates rich guys with 6 packs who play pro sports.

Enough is enough. 99% of us don’t look amazing in a bikini. 99% of you don’t look amazing in briefs. Women now-a-days are expected to have boobs like Sophia Vergara, an ass like Kim Kardashian (btw, I kind of hope she gains 98 pounds), a face like Jessica Alba (I was going to say Scarlett but didn’t want to google how to spell her last name), clean like Martha Stewart, cook like Rachel Ray, and follow sports like Sage Steel (has to be made up name, right?).

Guys, you are lucky we even let you touch us. We are pretty, and soft, and we smell good. You are lucky we don’t just date each other. Get it together.

And for those of you like Mr. Trashtastic with the bumper sticker who feel the need to put other people down because they don’t fit your simple minded view of what is attractive, you can go f yourself. I know I sound angry…because I am angry! You should be too. This guy is insulting half the population from afar every day he is out on the road. People that struggle with their weight, who know exactly what they look like, and are minding their own business, stop at a red light and BAM! Insult. What a dick face.

Those of you that know me, know that I have a sense of humor. I find offensive things funny all the time. I am offensive a lot of the time! But if you are going to offend, you need to be funny. No Fat Chicks is not funny. It’s stupid, it’s cliche, it’s immature, and it’s obnoxious.

Men, you’ve been warned.